Vote on the funniest call!!!!

On Tuesday evening, I’ll be calling in to Tom Scharpling’s “Best Show On WFMU” as a “humorous” character, Tom does his thing, misunderstandings ensue, funny bizness results, you may or may not know the drill. I need for you, reader, to vote on the funniest character idea. Here’s what I’ve come up with so far:

-In light of the recent reformation of Dinosaur Jr’s original line-up, I will call in as Del Tha Funkee Homosapien, Dinosaur Jr.’s collaborator on the Judgment Night soundtrack. He will be asking how to get a hold of J. Mascis, pining for an invitation to join them on stage, etc. This idea doesn’t make total sense, as the Dinosaur Jr. circa Judgment Night was the Mike Johnson-on-bass-Murph-in-the-bottle era (early-90’s). Hey, maybe that could be part of the call’s charm.

-Checking in to real life for a sec. Feral cat hunting is up for legalization in Wisconsin, I do not jest. I will be calling in as the proprietor of the first ever feral cat hunting lodge. Unless I can do better, it may be called “KittyKlasm.”
We’ll throw bait out in the fields (alleys?), like used scratching posts, soiled litter boxes, feather toys, and the like. We will have a ridiculous assortment of arms available for client rental (have yet to compose list - will be HILARIOUS).

-I could call in as Robert Blake, as I do a serviceable impersonation.

-I could mistake Tom Scharpling for “Troubleshooter” Tom Martino (”The Problem Solver”), the popular daytime talk radio host that attempts to do exactly what his name implies. This would be a recurring character (I’ve done it once before). I will call armed with several out-of-hand problems.

Ok, so what looks promising?