One of my only longtime loves, Unsolved Mysteries, both through prime time and syndicated rerun eras, airs everyday, as it has for the past 3 years, on Lifetime’s lunchtime 11A – 1p slot. Just-so-adorably-outdated, one can be jettisoned back to a more innocent time, of pre and/or nascent internet access, of exotic household items like Caller Id, etc. I pine for the time warp afforded me by Robert Stack’s distinctive (and defunct) voice asking, “Who is the elusive Unibomber?” or “Who is responsible for the heinous Oklahoma City bombing?” Below I’ve written a breakdown of good vs. bad in the Unsolved Mysteries portal to the past.

Good: UFO’s, Bigfoot, The Jersey Devil, Ball Lightning or the Brown Mountain Lights, most of the murder mysteries, missing persons, and ghosts.

Bad: Miracle “she-was-born-lifeless” babies, miracles, psychics, buried treasure, light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel nonsense, life-saving or mind reading pets, or most Theological mysteries.